My wife is a most knowing woman, She always is finding me out, She never will hear explanations But instantly puts me to rout, There's no use to try and deceive her, If out with my friends, night or day, In the most inconceivable manner She tells where I've been right away, She says that I'm "mean" and "inhuman" Oh! my wife is a most knowing woman. She would have been hung up for witchcraft If she had lived sooner, I know, There's no hiding anything from her, She knows what I do--where I go; And if I come in after midnight And say "I have been to the lodge," Oh, she says while she flies in a fury, "Now don't think to play such a dodge! It's all very fine, but wont do, man" Oh, my wife is a most knowing woman. Not often I got out to dinner And come home a little "so so," I try to creep up through the hall-way, As still as a mouse, on tip-toe, She's sure to be waiting up for me And then comes a nice little scene, "What, you tell me you're sober, you wretch you, Now don't think that I am so green! My life is quite worn out with you, man," Oh, my wife is a most knowing woman! She knows me much better than I do, Her eyes are like those of a lynx, Though how she discovers my secrets Is a riddle would puzzle a sphynx, On fair days, when we go out walking, If ladies look at me askance, In the most harmless way, I assure you, My wife give me, oh! such a glance, And says "all these insults you'll rue, man," Oh, my wife is a most knowing woman. Yes, I must give all my friends up If I would live happy and quiet; One might as well be 'neath a tombstone As live in confusion and riot. This life we all know is a short one, While some tongues are long, heaven knows, And a miserable life is a husbands, Who number his wife with his foes, I'll stay at home now like a true man, For my wife is a most knowing woman.
- by Stephen Collins Foster (1826 - 1864), "My wife is a most knowing woman" [author's text checked 1 time against a primary source]
Musical settings (art songs, Lieder, mélodies, (etc.), choral pieces, and other vocal works set to this text), listed by composer (not necessarily exhaustive)
- by Stephen Collins Foster (1826 - 1864), "My wife is a most knowing woman", published 1863. [voice and piano] [text verified 1 time]
Researcher for this text: Emily Ezust [Administrator]
This text was added to the website: 2010-11-02
Line count: 50
Word count: 372