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by Arthur Guiterman (1871 - 1943)

Strictly Germ‑Proof
Language: English 
Our translations:  ITA
The Antiseptic Baby and the Prophylactic Pup
Were playing in the garden when the Bunny gamboled up;
They looked upon the Creature with a loathing undisguised; --
It wasn't Disinfected and it wasn't Sterilized.

They said it was a Microbe and a Hotbed of Disease;
They steamed it in a vapor of a thousand-odd degrees;
They froze it in a freezer that was cold as Banished Hope
And washed it in permanganate with carbolated soap.

In sulphurated hydrogen they steeped its wiggly ears;
They trimmed its frisky whiskers with a pair of hard-boiled shears;
They donned their rubber mittens and they took it by the hand
And 'lected it a member of the Fumigated Band.

There's not a Micrococcus in the garden where they play;
They bathe in pure iodoform a dozen times a day;
And each imbibes his rations from a Hygienic Cup --
The Bunny and the Baby and the Prophylactic Pup.

First published in Women's Home Companion, 1906

Text Authorship:

  • by Arthur Guiterman (1871 - 1943), "Strictly Germ-Proof", appears in The Laughing Muse, first published 1915 [author's text not yet checked against a primary source]

Musical settings (art songs, Lieder, mélodies, (etc.), choral pieces, and other vocal works set to this text), listed by composer (not necessarily exhaustive):

  • by Gary Bachlund (b. 1947), "Strictly Germ-Proof", 2008 [ medium voice and piano ] [sung text checked 1 time]
  • by John Charles Sacco (1905 - 1987), "Strictly Germ‑Proof" [ voice and piano ] [sung text checked 1 time]

Available translations, adaptations or excerpts, and transliterations (if applicable):

  • ITA Italian (Italiano) (Ferdinando Albeggiani) , "A prova di germi", copyright © 2009, (re)printed on this website with kind permission


Researcher for this text: Emily Ezust [Administrator]

This text was added to the website: 2009-03-04
Line count: 16
Word count: 152

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