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by Friedrich von Hardenberg (1772 - 1801), as Novalis
Translation by George MacDonald (1824 - 1905)

Einst da ich bittre Tränen vergoß
Language: German (Deutsch) 
Einst da ich bittre Tränen vergoß, 
da in Schmerz aufgelöst meine Hoffnung zerrann, 
und ich einsam stand am dürren Hügel, 
der in engen, dunkeln Raum die Gestalt meines Lebens barg - 
einsam, wie noch kein Einsamer war, 
von unsäglicher Angst getrieben - 
kraftlos, nur ein Gedanken des Elends noch. - 
Wie ich da nach Hülfe umherschaute, 
vorwärts nicht konnte und rückwärts nicht, 
und am fliehenden, verlöschten Leben 
mit unendlicher Sehnsucht hing: - da kam aus blauen Fernen - 
von den Höhen meiner alten Seligkeit ein Dämmerungsschauer - 
und mit einem Male riß das Band der Geburt - 
des Lichtes Fessel. Hin floh die irdische Herrlichkeit 
und meine Trauer mit ihr - zusammen floß die Wehmut 
in eine neue, unergründliche Welt - du Nachtbegeisterung, 
Schlummer des Himmels kamst über mich - 
die Gegend hob sich sacht empor; 
über der Gegend schwebte mein entbundner, neugeborner Geist. 
Zur Staubwolke wurde der Hügel - 
durch die Wolke sah ich die verklärten Züge der Geliebten. 
In ihren Augen ruhte die Ewigkeit - 
ich faßte ihre Hände, 
und die Tränen wurden ein funkelndes, unzerreißliches Band. 
Jahrtausende zogen abwärts in die Ferne, wie Ungewitter. 
An ihrem Halse weint ich dem neuen Leben entzückende Tränen. - 
Es war der erste, einzige Traum - 
und erst seitdem fühl ich ewigen, 
unwandelbaren Glauben an den Himmel der Nacht 
und sein Licht, die Geliebte.

About the headline (FAQ)

Text Authorship:

  • by Friedrich von Hardenberg (1772 - 1801), as Novalis, no title, appears in Hymnen an die Nacht, no. 3 [author's text checked 1 time against a primary source]

Musical settings (art songs, Lieder, mélodies, (etc.), choral pieces, and other vocal works set to this text), listed by composer (not necessarily exhaustive):

  • by Olivier Greif (1950 - 2000), "Einst da ich bittre Tränen vergoß", 72 (1976) [ voice and piano ] [sung text not yet checked]

Available translations, adaptations or excerpts, and transliterations (if applicable):

  • ENG English (George MacDonald) , no title, appears in Rampolli: Growths from a Long Planted Root. Being Translations, New and Old, Chiefly from the German, first published 1897


Researcher for this text: Emily Ezust [Administrator]

This text was added to the website: 2008-08-17
Line count: 30
Word count: 209

Once when I was shedding bitter tears
Language: English  after the German (Deutsch) 
Once when I was shedding bitter tears,
when, dissolved in pain, my hope was melting away,
and I stood alone by the barren hillock
which in its narrow dark bosom hid the vanished form of my Life  --
lonely as never yet was lonely man,
driven by anguish unspeakable  --
powerless, and no longer aught but a conscious misery;  --
as there I looked about me for help,
unable to go on or to turn back,
and clung to the fleeting, extinguished life
with an endless longing:  --  then, out of the blue distances,
from the hills of my ancient bliss, came a shiver of twilight,  --
and at once snapt the bond of birth,
the fetter of the Light.  Away fled the glory of the world,
and with it my mourning  --  the sadness flowed together
into a new, unfathomable world.  -- Thou, soul of the Night,
heavenly Slumber, didst come upon me;  --
the region gently upheaved itself,
and over it hovered my unbound, new-born spirit.
The hillock became a cloud of dust,
and through the cloud I saw the glorified face of my beloved.
In her eyes eternity reposed.
I laid hold of her hands,
and the tears became a sparkling chain that could not be broken.
Into the distance swept by, like a tempest, thousands of years.
On her neck I welcomed the new life with ecstatic tears.  --
Never was such another dream;  --
then first and ever since I hold fast an eternal,
unchangeable faith in the heaven of the Night,
and its sun, the Beloved.

About the headline (FAQ)

Confirmed with George MacDonald, Rampolli: Growths from a Long Planted Root. Being Translations, New and Old, Chiefly from the German, Longmans, Green & Co., London, 1897.


Text Authorship:

  • by George MacDonald (1824 - 1905), no title, appears in Rampolli: Growths from a Long Planted Root. Being Translations, New and Old, Chiefly from the German, first published 1897 [author's text checked 1 time against a primary source]

Based on:

  • a text in German (Deutsch) by Friedrich von Hardenberg (1772 - 1801), as Novalis, no title, appears in Hymnen an die Nacht, no. 3
    • Go to the text page.

Musical settings (art songs, Lieder, mélodies, (etc.), choral pieces, and other vocal works set to this text), listed by composer (not necessarily exhaustive):

    [ None yet in the database ]


Researcher for this page: Melanie Trumbull

This text was added to the website: 2015-01-19
Line count: 30
Word count: 252

Gentle Reminder

This website began in 1995 as a personal project by Emily Ezust, who has been working on it full-time without a salary since 2008. Our research has never had any government or institutional funding, so if you found the information here useful, please consider making a donation. Your help is greatly appreciated!
–Emily Ezust, Founder

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